BartCop Entertainment Archives - Saturday, 13 May, 2006

Saturday

13 May, 2006

big hammer - bigger hammer

(Updated Daily)

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'Best of TBH Politoons'

Click Here!



Thanks, again, Tim!

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Reader Suggestion

Fun Link

Send your name to the asteroid belt on the Dawn spacecraft ! Your name will be recorded onto a microchip that will be placed aboard the spacecraft accompanying it on its mission to the asteroid belt. After entering your name, you will have the opportunity to print a document that verifies your journey aboard the spacecraft.

Send your name to the asteroid belt


Tiera


Thanks, Tiera!

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T.V. WOULD BE MORE

FUN TO WATCH IF THERE WERE MORE

GAY GUYS ON GAME SHOWS


zEN mAN
(falling in love with Pink-shirted bouncing up and down gay guy Gary on Howie Mandel's show called "Deal or No Deal")

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Recommended Reading

from Bruce

BOB HERBERT: Where's the Beef? (The New York Times)
Enough already with the analyses ad nauseam of the strategies and tactics and philosophies that the Democratic Party should pursue to regain power in upcoming elections.


Oochy woochy coochy coo (economist.com)
Women can read men like books.


Richard Roeper: Boycotts lack wallop, but they sure feel good (suntimes.com)
Every once in a while I'll get an e-mail from someone telling me how much they loathe my column. They read it every day, and they hate it every day, and they'll continue to hate it until one of us dies.


Mark Morford: Christian Virgins Are Overrated (sfgate.com)
Think sex and drugs destroy America? Try naive chastity. Oh, and "Purity Balls"


Meg Cabot: Note to Self (megcabot.com)
Words it turns out that authors should probably not say while guest-speaking at a middle-school assembly: Horny, Boobs, Diarrhea. Words this author said yesterday while guest-speaking at a middle-school assembly:


Roger Ebert: Art School Confidential (3 stars)
I believe you can go to school to learn to be an accountant, a doctor, a physicist, an engineer, an astronaut. I am not sure you can learn to be an artist. Artists are born, not made, and the real reason to study the arts is to have fun, learn technical skills, network with other creative types, fall in love with people who are not boring, and do the work you probably would have done anyway. That said, I highly recommend college. I majored in English and journalism, and wanted to be a graduate student forever.


Larry David Reads Greg Palast (gregpalast.com)

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from Jeff Crook

This is Jack

This is Jack.
Jack is a writer.
 
Jack's just trying to make it on his own as a writer without selling his writer soul. Jack is a dog with integrity. He barks his own bark and scratches his own fleas. But it's hard. Jack's taken to drinking out of the toilet. He's up half the night dragging his ass across the carpet. If he doesn't get a break in this writing business pretty soon, he's liable to hop a train to Ketchem, Idaho and blow his brains out with a shotgun, just like his literary hero, Papa.
 
Jack is just like a million other writers out there, struggling to sell their stories while a few inbred show champions eat ground filet-mignon from crystal bowls. Jack wishes the publishing industry were different, but it isn't, and he's not big enough or mean enough to change it.
 
But there is a way you can help. Go to http://www.literarybeggar.com/ to learn more about Jack, before he hops that train to Ketchum. Because if he can't be a famous writer, at least he can die like one.
 
Jeff Crook
 
PS. Please forward this to 10 of your friends or Jack will get the Old Yeller treatment.

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Another Rant - Mother's Day

Avery Ant

 


Vatican Condoms


In the spirit of this Mother's Day
Won't you please just let me say -

My Mom Is Better Than Your Mom!  
 

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Reader Comment

Re: Antfarm

Marty?

The ants seem determined to carry every grain of sand to the top level, and bury the little city."

Quick! you must (grab some bbq fluid) make a "lake of fire," and throw that thar ant project in it ... somebody snuck a economically infected, "Sodom-n-Gommorah" edition into yur mailbox while yew weren't lookin"!

Elsewise, your entire neighborhood could descend into a sinkhole of neo-con economic disaster should some of those nasty little creatures ever escape!

Maybe you don't see the danger, but them little beasties have been genetically altered by a group of economically bigotted, biology scientists (who were all then assassinated by Dick Cheney in less than a year after they done their dirty deed). It's part of their wee little souls, they are mandated by their double helix to hopelessly bury ANY civilization they find in debt. It's tha ant-farm from satan's a-hole!

No doubt, some evil little friend of yourn chile has substituted the normal sand you think he got from that there construction site with that from a box sold by that thar secret subsidiary of Haliburton called (full name) Klulessly Diebold, debt-crisis granules, Ink.

Perhaps it's too late and you've done let some little critter escape ... the price of gas up here in Pasadena is already suicidally insane!

Well'n, if'n an economic superquake washes all us in Los Angeles County into a terminally polluted Santa Monica Bay, we know whose fault it probably arn.

DanD


Hmmmm, Dan.
You do know that the movie Them! (1954) (Warner Bros.' highest grossing film of 1954) had its 3rd act in the sewers of LA?
Anyway, it's an antfarm without a queen. The poor little bastards are going have sexless lives, work themselves to death, then die out, leaving the white pseudo-sand stained a peculiar rust-color.
Sigh.

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Selected Readings

from that Mad Cat, JD

THAT'S THE WAY THE PRETZEL CRUMBLES

PURITY BALLS? SOUNDS LIKE A MALE STRIPPER

IT'S NOT ONLY ILLEGAL IT'S STUPID AS WELL

REBUBLICANS FOR HILLARY

FIND 'EM, FUCK 'EM AND FORGET 'EM

THE PITIFUL FAILURE OF A PRESIDENT HAS A PLAN. BOMB IRAN

THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY

MAMA, DON'T LET YOUR BABY GROW UP TO BE CONSERVATIVE

DEAF, DUMB AND RICE

KILL YOUR NEIGHBOR

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER REPUG CRIMINAL

BUSH IS A NO BRAINER! HEE HAW!

THE HELL THAT BUSH HAS WROUGHT

ITMFA!

THE GREAT ESCAPE

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Ark Of Darkness

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In The Chaos Household

Last Night

Sun was late again, and I was grateful.

Gas is still $3.39/gal at the local Chevron station.


No new flags.


Tonight, Saturday:

CBS opens the night with a RERUN 'CSI: The 2nd One', followed by a RERUN 'CSI: The 3rd One', then '48 Hours'.

NBC starts the night with 'Dateline', followed by a RERUN 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit', then a RERUN 'Law & Order: Criminal Intent'.
'SNL' is FRESH with Julia Louis-Dreyfus hosting, music by Paul Simon.
The late, late 'SNL', is from 8 January, 2000, with Jamie Foxx hosting, music by Blink 182.

ABC has LIVE 'NBA Basketball - Conference Semi-Final Game 3', then fills left coast prime time with the movie 'The Emperor's New Groove'.

The WB has an old 'Friends', followed by an old 'Raymond', then panders with 'Cheaters'.

Faux has LIVE 'NASCAR Racing', followed by 'Cops', and another 'Cops' on the East Coast.
The left coast gets 'Cops', 'Cops', an old 'Drew Carey', and an old 'Simpsons'.
'MAD TV' is FRESH.

UPN has an old 'Alias', followed by an old 'Fear Factor'.

A&E has 'City Confidential', 'American Justice', another 'American Justice', and still another 'American Justice'.

AMC offers the movie 'Octopussy', followed by the movie 'The Princess Bride', then 'Hustle', followed by the movie 'The Princess Bride', again.

BBC  -   
 [2pm]    'House Invaders' - Leicester;
 [2:30pm]    'House Invaders' - Parkfields;
 [3pm]    'Homes Under the Hammer' - Episode 6;
 [4pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Rabbitts;
 [4:30pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Mitchell;
 [5pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Pigott;
 [5:30pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - McKellin;
 [6pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Episode 5;
 [7pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Episode 6;
 [8pm]    'Lee Evans XL';
 [9:30pm]    'Circle';
 [11pm]    'Dress to Kill';
 [12am]    'Lee Evans XL';
 [1:30am]    'Circle';
 [3am]    'Dress to Kill';
 [4am]    'Comics Unleashed' - Episode 4;
 [4:40am]    'Comics Unleashed' - Episode 5;
 [5:20am]    'Comics Unleashed' - Episode 6;
 [6am]    'BBC World News'.    (ALL TIMES EDT)

Bravo has 'Top Chef', 'Kathy Griffin', followed by the movie 'Bridget Jones's Diary', then the movie 'Bridget Jones's Diary', again.

Comedy Central has the movie 'Not Another Teen Movie', followed by the movie 'Super Troopers'.

History has 'Apocalypse', 'The Antichrist', another 'The Antichrist', and 'Biblical Disasters'.

IFC  -   
 [6AM]    IFC In Theaters;
 [6:25AM]    Billy's Hollywood Screen Kiss;
 [8AM]    Blind Swordsman #2: The Return of Zatoichi;
 [9:15AM]    Widows' Peak;
 [11AM]    The Sweet Hereafter;
 [1PM]    Crossover;
 [2PM]    Blind Swordsman #2: The Return of Zatoichi;
 [3:15PM]    Daytrippers;
 [4:50PM]    The Sweet Hereafter;
 [6:45PM]    Crawlspace;
 [10PM]    The Henry Rollins Show #7;
 [10:30PM]    Samurai 7 Episode #7: The Friend;
 [11PM]    Elizabeth;
 [1:05AM]    The Henry Rollins Show #7;
 [1:30AM]    Samurai 7 Episode #7: The Friend;
 [2:05AM]    The Barbarian Invasions;
 [3:50AM]    Elizabeth.    (ALL TIMES EDT)

SciFi has the movie 'Shallow Ground', followed by the movie 'House Of The Dead'.

Sundance  -   
 [6:15AM]    In Short: In Short: Israel 3;
 [6:50AM]    Theo & Thea (and the 7 Dwarfs);
 [8:45AM]    The Object Of Beauty;
 [10:30AM]    Arna's Children;
 [12PM]    In Search of Gregory;
 [1:30PM]    Jane Birkin - Mother of All Babes;
 [2:30PM]    FACE;
 [4PM]    The Guggenheim and the Baroness;
 [5PM]    A Good Man in Africa;
 [6:45PM]    The Object Of Beauty;
 [8:30PM]    Reconstruction;
 [10PM]    Very Annie Mary;
 [11:45PM]    Tube Mice;
 [12AM]    City of Men: Episode 2: The Man's Brother-in-Law;
 [12:30AM]    Carrington;
 [2:35AM]    Porn Shutdown;
 [3:30AM]    The Five Obstructions;
 [5AM]    The Object Of Beauty.    (ALL TIMES EDT)

TCM:
 [6AM]    Of Human Bondage (1946);
 [8AM]    Nobody Lives Forever (1946);
 [10AM]    Topper Takes a Trip (1939);
 [11:30AM] Cartoon Alley #18 (2005);
 [12PM]    Bad Bascomb (1946);
 [2PM]    The Princess And The Pirate (1944);
 [4PM]    The Wind And The Lion (1975)     [View Trailer];
 [6PM]    The Quiller Memorandum (1966)     [View Trailer];
 [8PM]    Ride The High Country (1962)     [View Trailer];
 [10PM]    Breakheart Pass (1976)     [View Trailer];
 [12AM]    A Kiss Before Dying (1956);
 [1:45AM]    The Killing (1956)     [View Trailer];
 [3:15AM]    The Hawaiians (1970);
 [5:30AM] MGM Parade Show #19 (1955).    (ALL TIMES EDT)


Sunday  -  05/14

TCM:
 [6AM]    The Catered Affair (1956);
 [8AM]    Mildred Pierce (1945)     [View Trailer];
 [10AM]    Three Daring Daughters (1948);
 [12PM]    Bachelor Mother (1939)     [View Trailer];
 [1:30PM]    Imitation Of Life (1934)     [View Trailer];
 [3:30PM]    I Remember Mama (1948);
 [6PM]    Ride The High Country (1962)     [View Trailer];
 [8PM]    Trapeze (1956);
 [10PM]    Shadows And Fog (1992)     [View Trailer];
 [12AM]    The Circus (1928) SILENT ;
 [1:15AM]    The Wagons Roll At Night (1941);
 [2:45AM]    The Great Ziegfeld (1936)     [View Trailer].    (ALL TIMES EDT)



Any opinions?

Or reviews?







(See below for addresses)

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Actress Pam Grier arrives for a special screening of the ABC Network special 'Oprah Winfrey's Legend's Ball' in New York May 11, 2006.
Photo by Keith Bedford
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Click Here!

Moose & Squirrel - The Blog

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Google News Cloud U.S.

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Shooter Cops Plea

Siegfried & Roy

Ex-NFL kicker Cole Ford pleaded guilty Thursday to opening fire on the Las Vegas home of illusionist duo Siegfried & Roy in 2004. The plea was part of deal aimed at keeping the former footballer from spending up to six years in prison.

Ford, hospitalized for mental illness after the shooting and currently in jail, agreed to cop to the incident to be eligible for a suspended sentence. Per the deal, he will likely continue his treatment at a mental health facility in lieu of prison.

According to the Las Vegas Review-Journal, a psychiatric examination conducted after Ford's arrest indicated he believed Siegfried and Roy would trigger an apocalypse.

"While watching Siegfried and Roy, he had a sudden realization that what was wrong with the world was linked to the illusionists' treatment, dominance and unhealthy intimacy he saw them having with their animals," psychiatrist Norton Roitman wrote in the report. "He saw their illusions as their power to distort and change reality. He felt they threatened [the] world, and he began trying to figure out how he could stop them."

Ford, armed with a shotgun, drove to the entertainers' home, screamed, "We need to get...Siegfried and Roy out of this country," and began unloading into the house, shattering several windows and leaving a large hole in one of the walls. No one was hurt in the incident.

Siegfried & Roy

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Retroland

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Fear-Mongerer As Inspiration

Mel Gibson

Film star and director Mel Gibson has launched a scathing attack on US resident George W Bush, comparing his leadership to the barbaric rulers of the Mayan civilisation in his new film Apocalypto.

The epic, due for release later this year, captures the decline of the Maya kingdom and the slaughter of thousands of inhabitants as human sacrifices in a bid to save the nation from collapsing.

Gibson reveals he used present day American politics as an inspiration, claiming the government callously plays on the nation's insecurities to maintain power.

He tells British film magazine Hotdog, "The fear-mongering we depict in the film reminds me of President Bush and his guys".

Mel Gibson

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Elton John performs on stage at the Victoria Palace theater in London to mark the third anniversary of the musical Billy Elliot Friday, May 12, 2006.
Photo by Andrew Parsons
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surrealism

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Concert for Katrina Relief

McGraw-Hill

Mississippi native Faith Hill and husband Tim McGraw say they plan to donate proceeds from their summer concert to benefit Gulf Coast hurricane relief.

Hill and McGraw will perform July 5 at the New Orleans Arena as part of their "Soul2Soul II" tour. Hill is a native of Star, Miss.; McGraw grew up in Start, La.

Proceeds will go to their new Neighbor's Keeper Foundation and other organizations assisting individuals in Mississippi and Louisiana who are suffering from the effects of Hurricane Katrina.

McGraw-Hill

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Weird TV

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'Roads to You: Celebration of One World'

Global Musicians

Thirty young musicians from 18 countries including Iran, Mexico, Denmark and South Korea are fanning out across the United States this month to perform in the hope of teaching cross-cultural understanding.

"Roads to You: Celebration of One World," is the brainchild of Jordanian pianist Zade Dirani, 26, who has performed for Nelson Mandela, Queen Elizabeth, former U.S. President Bill Clinton, Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, and the Dalai Lama.

Backed by Jordan's Queen Noor, Boston's Berklee College of Music and Seeds of Peace, the project aims to "bring world cultures closer together," says Dirani, who recently won a coveted U.S. "green card," or permanent residency permit, based on his ability.

Global Musicians

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bartcook

In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends

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Gets Hollywood Star

Nancy Sinatra

Nancy Sinatra pulled on a pair of boots one more time Thursday for a strut on the Walk of Fame.

The 1960s pop icon was honored with a star on Hollywood Boulevard four decades after the debut of her rebel hit "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'" in 1966.

The daughter of Frank Sinatra was also known for her blonde bouffant, vampy style and string of chart-topping tunes, including "Sugar Town" and the James Bond title track "You Only Live Twice."

Nancy Sinatra

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Actress Cindy Crawford and husband Rande Gerber, left, pose with fashion designer Roberto Cavalli at a celebration for the launch of Cavalli's new vodka in Hollywood, Calif., Thursday, May 11, 2006.
Photo by Lucas Jackson
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Weegee's World

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Future Questionable

'Deadwood'

It may be high noon for "Deadwood," HBO's gritty Western drama.

HBO has allowed options on the cast to lapse, freeing the actors of their obligations to the show. But a spokeswoman for the premium cable channel said Friday the door hasn't been shut on the possibility of another season.

The series, about life in the infamous 19th-century mining town, returns for its third season June 11. The ensemble cast includes Ian McShane, Timothy Olyphant, William Sanderson and Molly Parker.

'Deadwood'

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Last Images Posted on LiveJournal

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Returning To Vegas Act

Jerry Lewis

Comedian Jerry Lewis is set to return this summer to the Orleans Hotel and Casino for his first live Las Vegas performance since his health took a turn for the worse six years ago, his publicist said on Friday.

Lewis, 80, is booked for a four-night comeback engagement from July 13 to 16 at the Orleans Showroom, where he was a regular fixture before various medical problems sidelined the veteran entertainer, spokeswoman Candi Cazau told Reuters.

He has not performed at the Orleans since 2000, Cazau said, adding that Lewis had shed all the excess weight he had gained from the steroid treatments.

Lewis also plans to bring his annual Labor Day telethon for muscular dystrophy back to Las Vegas, hosting this year's show September 3-4 at the South Coast Hotel and Casino, Cazau said.

Jerry Lewis

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I'm Pissed
(formerly 'The Vidiot')

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Gets Jail Time

Leif Garrett

Leif Garrett was sentenced to 90 days in jail and three years' probation after opting out of a drug treatment program.

The 44-year-old former teen idol was given credit Thursday for the jail time he had already served since being taken into custody March 30 after a Superior Court commissioner determined he failed several drug tests while staying in a live-in drug diversion program.

Garrett's attorney, Andrew Flier, said his client decided to leave the program, which required frequent tests and daily counseling, because it was too strict.

Leif Garrett

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Shigeru Miyamoto, left, legendary video game designer for Nintendo, known as the Spielberg of video games, having created Mario and the Legend of Zelda, plays Tennis with Steven Spielberg on Nintendo's new game console called Wii, using the controller as the racket to physically hit the virtual ball, while attending the E3 Electronic Entertainment Expo in Los Angeles on Friday, May 12, 2006.
Photo by Branimir Kvartuc
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Classic Buick Showcase

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Only Rich People Merit Privacy

SEC's "Katie Couric" Clause

Hollywood doesn't blink at paying top dollar for the right actor in a movie deal, but a federal proposal for media companies to reveal their stars' salaries has studios crying "cut!"

CBS Corp., Walt Disney Co. and Viacom Inc. are among the media companies asking the Securities and Exchange Commission to drop a proposal that would require them to tell the world how much they pay their top-earning non-executives such as actors and TV news anchors.

The entertainment industry is abuzz over the so-called "Katie Couric" clause in a broad SEC plan for publicly traded companies to give shareholders more information about multimillion-dollar salaries. The designation comes from "Today" show co-host Couric, who is leaving NBC at the end of May to join CBS as anchor and managing editor of "The CBS Evening News With Katie Couric" for a reported salary of $15 million over five years.

Companies protesting the SEC plan, which also include DreamWorks Animation SKG Inc., and News Corp., insist that the salary structure for high-paid talent is too complex and irrelevant to shareholders. The new rule also might scare away high-profile individuals who prefer to keep their financial terms private, the companies say.

SEC's "Katie Couric" Clause

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Berlin Wall

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Causes Stir at Video Game Expo

Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton unveiled her new video game on Thursday, but inexplicably called it by the wrong name as she greeted throngs of fans and photographers.

Wearing a green minidress and red platform pumps, Hilton made a brief appearance at the Electronic Entertainment Expo to promote "Paris Hilton's Jewel Jam."

"Sorry I'm late," the heiress said. "I'm really excited to have my new video game, 'Diamondquest.' Thank you all for coming, and you can download the game," she said.

Paris Hilton

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An undated fie photo, originally provided by the St. Louis Art Museum, shows the burial mask of Ka Nefer Nefer.The Museum will keep the 3,200-year-old mummy mask unless it gets more proof it belongs to Egypt. The museum won't meet a May 15 deadline set by Egyptian antiquities authorities to return the mask, Museum Director Brent Benjamin said Friday, May 12, 2006. The authorities claim the mask was probably stolen before it was obtained by the art museum in 1998.
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9/11 in 3D

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Memorabilia Collector Sues

Beach Boys

A rock memorabilia collector has sued the Beach Boys for preventing him from selling sheet music he says he bought two decades ago but that the rock musicians claim he stole from them.

Roy Sciacca of Florida claims in the lawsuit he had bought several boxes of memorabilia from the Beach Boys at auctions held in California in the 1980s.

He claims the Beach Boys' manager had sold the items, but the band claims he had stolen the sheet music, which includes handwritten musical scores to classics such as "California Girls" and "I get around."

Brother Records, which owns the rights to the Beach Boy's music, blocked a planned auction of the items last year and filed a lawsuit in California against Sciacca.

Beach Boys

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10 eCard Sites To Stay Away From This Mother's Day

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A Face In The Roots

Asparagus Fern



A gardener had a revelation when he dug up his asparagus plant and saw the face of Jesus.

Martin Gregory was enjoying his Sunday morning gardening when he noticed something quite different about one of his asparagus ferns he removed from a pot.

As the 52-year-old laid the 30-inch plant on the grass the sun shone down on the roots and revealed the face of Jesus to him.

"I've heard about Mother Theresa's face being seen in a bagel but I thought this was much better."

Asparagus Fern

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A tourist views Longmen Grottoes in the city of Luoyang in China's central province of Henan May 12, 2006. 'Longmen Grottoes' is one of China's UNESCO World Heritage sites in Henan Province. Longmen has more than 2,300 grottoes with 110,000 Buddhist images, over 80 dagobas and 2,800 inscribed tablets on cliffs with a length of one kilometer along the Yishui River, where Buddhism was first introduced to China during the Eastern Han Dynasty (25 - 220), according to Xinhua News.
Photo by Claro Cortes IV
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Printable Maps

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Time Warner Buys Liberty Stake

Court TV

Media conglomerate Time Warner Inc. said on Friday it bought Liberty Media's 50 percent stake in their Court TV joint venture for $735 million, in a deal likely to spotlight additional cable asset sales.

Time Warner and Liberty, controlled by cable magnate John Malone, are also in talks over Liberty's 4 percent stake in Time Warner, possibly involving a swap for such assets as the Atlanta Braves Major League Baseball team.

With the acquisition, Court TV will operate as part of Turner Broadcasting, home to CNN, TBS and the Cartoon Network.

Court TV

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Dead Blues Guys

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Arrested After Radio Rants

DJ Star

A syndicated hip-hop disc jockey was arrested Friday on charges of harassment and endangering the welfare of a child amid an uproar over his on-air racial and sexual rants about a radio rival's wife and 4-year-old daughter.

Police officials had launched a hate crime investigation of DJ Star, whose real name is Troi Torain, on Thursday after reviewing a transcript of his recent remarks about DJ Envy and his family.

In the comments, made between May 3 and Monday, Torain - co-host of the "Star & Buc Wild Morning Show" - offered $500 to any listener who could provide information about the rival DJ's daughter's school and used racial slurs when talking about his rival's wife, Gia Casey, who is part Asian.

Torain also called the couple's child a "little half a lo mein eater" and said he wanted to "do an R. Kelly on your seed, on your little baby girl. I would like to tinkle on her," according to the excerpts.

DJ Star

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Eternal Sunset

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'Fleur de Lys Cross Key' from the movie 'Da Vinci Code' designed by Hong Kong jewelry designer Michelle Ong are displayed at a shopping mall to promote the film in Hong Kong Friday, May 12, 2006. The movie will show on screen on May 18.
Photo by Kin Cheung
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Welcome !


You have reached the Home page of BartCop Entertainment.
Make yourself home, take your shoes off...
Go ahead, scratch it if it itches.

The idea is to have fun.

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